faith · scripture · worldview

Overwhelmed by Darkness

Where have I been? I’m sure both of my readers have missed me (*snort*), but, quite frankly, I basically want to write this:

Read your Bible. Stop reading everything else. Stop reading what other people are writing (yes, including me!) and focus on Jesus. He is our only hope, and all y’all need to get off the computer and into your Scriptures and just. stop. the. madness.

But I was told that’s not very helpful, so…so here I am trying to reawaken the brain section where my writing muscles live.


Some moments of each day I am almost paralyzed by the overwhelming darkness of our lives. I hate that I was right about certain things. I take no joy in that. I hate that women I love are being deceived by the droves by false teachers. I hate that II Timothy 4:3-4 is being lived out in my own neighborhood. I hate that most people are afraid of the word “hate,” and think that I am sinning by simply using that word. I hate that preachers aren’t properly exegeting Scripture, taking time to study it thoroughly, but are instead relying upon best selling books written by men who should not be consulted about anything, especially anything regarding the salvation of people’s souls.

I am experiencing a radical shift in my theological foundation, and that is taking no small amount of time, study, prayer, and discussion with my husband. As we transition away from the Restoration Movement (and that is an enormous mess, let me tell you, especially in Indianapolis, and in its academic institutions) I am heartbroken for what I see happening. The election tomorrow is only highlighting the mess that it is – I have seen pastors say the most horrendous and abusive things to people on social media, and I have literally cringed, thinking that it’s no wonder the back doors of Independent Christian Churches are as wide and free-flowing as the front doors. The shepherds are too busy telling people how to vote instead of realizing their congregants are guzzling false doctrine like super sized Slurpees.

I am at a loss to explain why people blame Satan for their sin when Scripture is crystal clear that the source of sin is their very self – not the prince of this world. James tells us that the source of all sin – ALL SIN – is lust in our very selves – lust of our flesh. That lust gives birth to sin, and sin gives birth to death (James 1:14-15). Why are Christian leaders so quick to blame Satan? Just say, “I am a sinner.” Paul said it. Heck, Paul said he was chief of sinners – and he was the greatest apostle of all time. Quit telling people Satan is making you sin, and admit that you are a wretched sinner in need of the Savior.

I’m just a cheerful ball of sunshine, aren’t I? 😉

In reality I am just overwhelmed. I realize it is not my job to change the world, and praise God for that! Focusing on my son, my husband, our home, our family, our homeschool community, and our new little church family seems to be about all that I can handle these days. I can’t be responsible to fix every false doctrine that blows in the wind – nor should I. But I *can* write about certain things, theological things, church things, women’s things… However, like I said…I’ve just been overwhelmed by the darkness lately.


But I have the hope of Jesus. Amen? And I must cling to that – to Him. Even in the darkness, the Light of the World is there for me. It may seem to just be a tiny flicker some days, but He is always, always there. I don’t have to feel Him, or hear Him, or experience Him. I know He is there, because Scripture promises that He is with me. Matthew 28: 20 ends with, “and, lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Jesus promised that He would be with us, always.

No matter what happens, no matter who is elected to any political office tomorrow, no matter what happens to me or my family, no matter what false doctrine sweeps Christianity this week, no matter what friends I lose because I stand for Truth yet again…


3 thoughts on “Overwhelmed by Darkness

  1. When we focus on the Lord, He directs us to the things that do grieve Him and it is sad to see most professing Christians are won over by the spirit of defeat and do not exercise their God-given freedom to ensure that those freedoms remain to preach His word and reach more people for Him.

    Whoever wins this election, we are only warned that things will only take a turn for the worse in fulfillment to what’s written in Scriptures but it is absolutely wrong for professing Christians to stay in the sidelines and go along with the gender dysphoria agenda this current administration is further indoctrinating the minds of children in the public school system and will be furthered by Clinton by being passive when it comes to choosing between 2 platforms which has 2 opposing stances regarding religious freedom. One is for Islam and one is against. An introduction of Islam to a nation (Clinton with her proposed flood of Migrants which by the way are not just women and children who might later on demand Sharia) only means one thing, subjugation and we have the whole of Europe to learn from.

    People fail to see this and are stuck with the petty things for which they themselves possibly secretly struggle with. It is definitely easy to judge other people than our own wretched selves and it’s sad it becomes a justification to squander their right to vote and say all they can do is pray. This is an example for the often misquoted “Faith without works is dead.”


  2. When I heard about the recent Hatmaker incident, I immediately recalled your earlier blog post. It was the first time I had ever heard of her. No, there is no joy in being right but there IS joy in speaking truth. You’re doing a great job. Don’t stop. Blessings, sister.


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