adoptive parenting · anger · being a mommy · family · fear · life is messy · racism · transracial adoption

Murder & White Privilege

Last week, a pregnant woman was shot in the head, and killed, in her own home, in Indianapolis. It occurred during a home invasion. She was certainly not the only murder victim in Indy last week, but if you judged by media reports and the way the police department press releases read, you’d think she’d been the only murder victim in years.
I cannot figure out why she was so special that her murder deserves all this attention. I mean, yes, it’s truly tragic: young, pregnant, a toddler home at the same time, a pastor’s wife. The real truth? She was white and fairly well-to-do. How many other murder victims in Indy last week were pretty young white women?
It’s white privilege in the grossest manner.
My son’s birth uncle was also murdered this last week, also shot in the head, execution style, also during what appears to be a home invasion. It made the crime section of the newspaper…one single, solitary paragraph. He was twice the age of the young white woman, had children, grandchildren, a huge family who adored him. But he was a Black man, in a town where Black men are murdered every day, so who cares, right?
The police department are “pouring every resource into finding the young woman’s murderer,” according to the press conference. They had a press conference! There have been over 100 murders in Indianapolis this year, and hers garners a press conference. Doesn’t every loss of life deserve the full resources of the police department? Or are they just reassuring the good ole white people of Indy that they’re not going to allow the violence normally contained within the Black community to spill over?
I said to Keith that I was sickened over the media coverage of the woman’s murder, not because I’m heartless, but because my son’s potential wife or mother-in-law wouldn’t receive the same treatment. As Little Man becomes not to little, I see unfortunate glimmers of racism creeping in to the way he’s treated. It alternately breaks my heart and makes me rage with anger at people’s ignorance and cruelty.
It makes my soul weary when people claim we live in a post-racial society, or that racism is false, or that white privilege doesn’t exist. We have been disowned by our own family this year because we said their racist ways were not welcome around our son – and their responses were classic white privilege. “I’m not racist because you adopted Little Man.” I’m pretty sure people in other states heard my response to that stupidity 😉
And what is the worst? I can’t protect my baby. I cannot shield him from racism, from stupidity, from cruelty. I can only pray, and beg Jesus to pour His sovereign protection upon our son in ways I can’t even begin to comprehend. And beg Jesus to pour His sovereign peace upon me to parent the strongest way possible.

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