It’s February. Historically, for me, this is the roughest month of the year. I struggle with the lack of sunshine, the frigid temperatures, and my anxiety is at its highest. I was hoping this year might be different, but it doesn’t seem to be 😦

But, I have some random things to say, so I thought I’d just put them in one general post!

First, we’ve decided to go with Classical Conversations next year for Little Man. He’ll start with Foundations, and I believe he’ll be in level 2, based on his age and abilities. We observed the local group yesterday, and we both loved it. He proclaimed it AWESOME and wants to go back next week. He’s a little disappointed we have to wait until the fall to start going regularly! I was super impressed with how engaged the kids were, their behavior, and how loving and welcoming the community was.

We briefly (and I mean, like maybe for two hours) contemplated public school for kindergarten. (there were many reasons for this discussion, but pressing financial issues were primarily behind it. ugh. money.) Then we had a good laugh at the state of public education in Indiana and decided definitely not. Then I read some things over the next weekend and was even more convicted that God gives children parents for a reason, and it is our primary responsibility to bring them up in Him. So…Classical Conversations it is.

Second, between the frigid weather, Little Man’s sleep issues and Keith’s work schedule, my running is off again. I ran eight miles last Sunday, but have only been able to run once since then. I know that plays a huge part in managing my anxiety and mood…but it’s hard to decide: do I spend 45 minutes with my boys or do I go run? (and that’s if it’s warm enough to run outside. If I have to go to the gym, it takes 90 minutes, minimum) Which is better, overall: taking care of myself, so I can take care of them? Or spending time with them, because they want to hang out with me? Some mornings running wins; some mornings they really need me to make a hot breakfast.

Society would have me believe I need to put myself first, always, every time. Society would say that I can’t effectively take care of them if I’m not taking care of myself. But that’s not what the Bible teaches, at all. Society would also like me to buy into the gigantic, massive lie that “I can have it all,” but I know that is such a lie straight from the mouth of satan. I can’t have it all. I can’t get 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep each night, work 40 hours a week at a glamorous high-paying job with excellent benefits, exercise two hours a day, provide fresh and healthy meals for my family, AND have God-honoring relationships with my husband and son, all while maintaining my perfect HOA model-level house in the suburbs and a sparkling SUV.

Nope.

So I don’t even try 🙂

Speaking of lies straight from the mouth of satan…if you’re wrestling with the lie that God calls you to have “big dreams” or “IF:God is real” or that “if it doesn’t scare you it isn’t from God” or any of that other nonsense that is infiltrating the women’s ministries of the local evangelical churches these days, check out this website. These women are involved in a discernment ministry. They have come out of a New Age background, and they spend their time in ministry debunking false doctrines and teachings. Even better is their Facebook page, where they post up-to-the-minute information about what is happening right now. I love it. I probably ought to repost their stuff…but I chicken out a lot 😦

Well, that’s probably enough for today. I *do* want to post more often…*sigh*. I’m only able to post right now because I’ve convinced the kid he needed to rest on the couch with a video, since he’s got a bit of a cough…Most days I don’t have time to sit down and do this 🙂