Tonight I put you to bed as a one year old.
Technically, yesterday you were 52 weeks old, and tonight marks 52 weeks since we brought you home from the hospital.
52 weeks since your first mother, a woman that your father and I love and respect, a woman who miraculously came back into your life today, signed papers and told a judge that she picked us to be your parents.
I hope someday you can understand everything involved in your adoption. I hope you understand (and love) you birthmother’s heart – her choices – her needs – her desires for you. I hope you understand (and love) our heart – our choices – our needs – our desires for you.
I don’t think there is a one year old on earth that is more loved than you. You have more family and more friends than we can count. People everywhere we go comment on you and your smile and your personality. Everyone who gets to spend even a little time with you falls in love with you.
You are loved.
You are an incredible creation of God. I have said since before you were born that, knowing all I know about you and have known since then, God has huge plans for you. Huge.
I put to bed tonight my baby boy… who is really no longer a baby. You are my baby, forever, I promise, but you are now, officially, a little boy. And I am a little sad, but I am so grateful for the chance to be your mama.
I am also excited to see what the future holds. Your future, my future, S’s future…and now, our future, hopefully together.
Oh, son, I love you so very much that tonight my heart hurts from all of that love.
Sleep tight, my little son.
My precious, loved little boy.
Tomorrow we start a whole ‘nother year!!!