One thing that I take great comfort in is the number of women who blog about being adoptive mommies and how it took them some time to be “comfortable” with the mommy label. Don’t get me wrong – we love our children to the utmost, but it was…weird…to suddenly be labeled “mommy.”
I struggled with that as well. Not for myself…I started calling myself “Mama” as soon as Little Man came into our lives. I can refer to myself as mama and mommy with no problem. I can even enjoy it when my husband, family and good friends call me the same.
But strangers…a totally different story. I felt like I had to explain that I was his mama. I had to justify it. I had to sidestep the issue.
That is changing. It took some time, but we’re getting there. But I’ve had some experiences lately that have firmed up for me that I am a mommy!
*****
A few weeks ago, the fire alarm went off during the sermon at church. Loud siren, flashing lights, a mechanical female voice inviting us to leave the building. Turns out a preschool kiddo pulled the alarm, but…my first thought? GET YOUR CHILD. I have been leaving Little Man in the nursery since he was about 2 months old. The nursery is maybe one city block down the hall from where I was worshiping. Hubby was serving elsewhere in the building.
That alarm sounded and I bolted for the nursery. My only thought was, “Get your son out of the building now.” I ignored my 9 month pregnant girlfriend sitting next to me. I ignored my absolute BFF whose foot was in a boot post-surgery and needed her wheelchair that was backstage. I even ignored the special needs member who was shrieking in the hallway due to the commotion. I actually briefly considered pausing for her, but some animal instinct in my brain propelled me on to the nursery. Because I am a mommy.
*****
This past Sunday. Same church nursery. I’m dropping off Little Man by putting him in the jeep exersaucer thingie. A little girl topples over, and because all of the workers are holding babies, I pick her up. She’s fine, I set her back down on the play mat. One of the volunteers says, “She’s fine. She just needed a mommy to pick her up.” Huh. Because I am a mommy.
*****
I start my new stroller exercise class. Women are asking me about LM’s stats when he was born. No problem – I was there. But then they ask me about my labor experience (which, by the way, that question is a whole other post). Because I am a mommy.
*****
And speaking of mommies, my mommy is cancer-free. They got out all the cancerous cells and she has been proclaimed healthy. Thank You, Jesus! And thank YOU, everyone who prayed for her and/or me, lately!!
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Praise God! (about your mom)
…and that you're a mommy 😉
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When people asked me about my labor experience I started off by saying, “It was more emotionally painful than physically…she's adopted”.
Yeah for your mom!!!!!!!! God is so good!!
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I think it takes a little bit to change your metaphysical data. Your brain knows you are now a mom, but your conscious takes a while to apply a label.
Two things happened one when he was 1 day old, and one when he was 5.5 mos old. Day 1 he had a very inept heel stick from a nurse, and I got ticked. I immediately went into “NOT NICE LADY” and told Nurse to get a phlebotomist next time!
And a few weeks ago, I fell while carrying him in my ergo, and my only thoughts were to fall so that he wouldn't get completely flattened by me! Those two moments, I felt clearly “MOMMY”
I'm so happy your mom is healthy! That is an amazing prayer answered!!
If I were away from J. and any kind of emergency happened, I think I'd flatten anyone in my path! Good for you to be able to dodge them!
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LOVE this post and so glad to hear about your mom!!
I love the instinctual part of being someone's MOM. There is something so special about that feeling of wanting to protect another human being, even at the cost of your own safety and/or life.
I've always thought about that with the breathing mask thingies on airplanes. I can certainly see the logical thinking that surrounds affixing your own mask first but I don't know how you'd actually do that if you were really in that situation.
Melba
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