being a mommy · family

Mama Bear

That’s me. S told me one time on the phone that I would become a Mama Bear. She was right.

Easter dinner. Tons of family. Family that has been fractured since my grandfather’s death last May. Family that includes grandpa’s girlfriend – who only about 1/3 of us really like (but she’s rich, right, so let’s keep her around…that’s what the other 2/3 things anyway…). Grandpa’s girlfriend once called my husband racist.

I really wanted to point out that my racist husband was holding our African American/Hispanic son, but I refrained.

Everybody wanted to hold Little Man. While he’s teething. And dressed in his finery in 80 degree weather (I eventually stripped him down to just a onesie, but I had to get a picture first!).

So that’s when the “advice” starts. No sooner do we sit down to eat (with Little Man snoozing away in his carseat in the quieter front room) than people start in:

“He’s too hot.”

“He can sleep in here” (with the radio and dinner conversation)

“Heat up his formula”

“Give him a frozen french fry for teething”

“Rub some whisky on his gums”

“He’s too hot”

“He better never wear his pants down around his butt” (this from my uncle, whose 22 year old daughter dresses like a $22, well…what’s a nice word? street walker)

“He’s too hot”

“He can watch ‘The Blind Side,’ it’s just football”

“What do you mean you don’t want him watching TV?”

“He’s too hot” (notice a theme, here???????)

“He doesn’t need a pacifier”

“Give him rice in his formula – he’ll sleep through the night”

“He sounds congested”

“He’s sick – he has a cold”

“He’s too young to be teething.”

Eventually, I’d had enough. I not-so-subtly convinced my husband it was time to head to his mom’s house. We loaded up and my uncle said something about how they had to listen to advice – they gave my mom tons of advice – didn’t I realize that. I said, “well, she was divorced at that point, so I hope you were a little nicer to her.”

Then I left.


I love my family, but seriously? I’m the mama. I know what he needs.

5 thoughts on “Mama Bear

  1. i hate that!!! just be strong mama! I said something to my mother in law like “i'm his momma, I know what he needs” after she nagged me that he didn't have enough blankets on him. I said it in a sweet playful way but she got the point. I guess we will do it to people too after we have some experience! But I totally know, it's super annoying!


  2. Way to Go Mama Bear! I think every mama has people giving her unwanted advice. I'd like to think they give advice out of great love of the baby, so I guess you don't have any trouble with him being accepted. My family has done that bunches, but my family is Cuckoo. Good Plan, Step 1, Leave.


  3. Where's the picture?

    I'm sorry that everyone tries to be mother. I know that will surely happen to me someday, as I live in a town with both my mother and mother-in-law. Everyone knows best.


  4. More additional advice (ha ha): Stay strong and stick to your mom guns.

    Our Little One isn't here yet, but boy oh boy…can't wait for all of that advice when she eventually arrives…[please note very sarcastic tone of this last comment]

    Best and peace.


  5. Some of the advice you'll get is annoying. Some of it is useful (you know, like mine lol). Take it all with a grain of salt and know that you're a great mama who's doing what's best for YOUR little man! đŸ™‚


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